You sicken me…your kind should be banished

This…is going to be long so if I was you and you don't like long rants, I'd stop here. No seriously.

Anyway today we had a cup game against AFC Mottingham, for those of you who don't know about this team they have no shortage of what we'd call "scum" in their ranks and I shall explain why in a bit.

The match started out as a bit of a shaky affair, they were pressurising us a lot but it was no cause for concern as it's a recurring theme with teams who face us and aren't very good. Play fast and furious for the start and ruffle the other team's feathers early to mask the lack of stamina in your own team. So all we had to do was to be patient as I knew that the last half hour in the game would be crucial as that's when they'll be exposed as the unfit team that they are.

Things didn't quite go to plan as we conceded quite early on as miscommunication rears its ugly head and Ryan and Tommy failed to deal with what should have been a simple clearance leading to Mottingham scoring in an open goal quite clearly putting a spanner in the works.

The second goal came from a penalty which was from a clumsy tackle from Phil but I do not begrudge him for this as he is inexperienced in the left back role and I suppose will gain the experience and get better judgement of when to attack for the ball or to stand them off.

The penalty however was one that was actually poorly taken, they had already made clear their intentions to blast the ball so all that was required was to save the shot that was clearly going in the middle but that couldn't be managed. Suffice to say, that was disappointing.

So here we were, two-nil down but cracks were clearly showing in the other team, they could not pass the ball like we could, they did not have a dominant and imposing figure in the middle that could control the game like we did. The only time I got worried was when we starting to play a little desperate and stopped playing short balls and were all over the place and lost our shape but those moments were few and in between.

The second half was maybe a little better however I did have a few concerns at how slow we were to move the ball from the back. I get a little nervous when our centre backs and full backs get the ball simply because there is usually little room for error and past experience has shown me that when put into a pressure situation like that the right decision isn't always made.

I am a firm believer in that if myself, William and Ryan are playing in the middle then we should always have the ball the majority of the times when we want to attack therefore we should quickly give the defence an option to get the ball to us as quick as possible so we can do our job and supply the ammunition for our attacking forces.

So in the second half they scored after what should have been a routine save from a long shot somehow squirmed underneath our goalkeeper to give them a three-nil lead. Yep, this clearly inferior team were winning by 3 goals because of us, not because they were decent or anything but because we gave them all three goals.

We got a goal back when William decided to dribble straight from kickoff after their goal and somehow Mario had placed it in the back of the net to cut their celebrations short but not only that they had managed to get a player sent off to make harder work for them as their lack of stamina was now beginning to show.

Mario got us a second and a third goal to bring the score back to 3-3 and they managed to get yet another player sent off in the process and thus the game went into extra time.

No-one could break through during it so it went to penalties which...well we lost.

If you made it this far...good for you, that was the match report, a little background information about what spurred this on and my utter disgust.

AFC Mottingham are the most disgusting team I’ve ever played and yes while it wasn’t everyone in their team so I apologise in advance for tarnishing them all with the same brush but you really aren’t that much better if you condone that sort of antics. Football………I grow tired and bored of it, I barely even watch it anymore as I’ve already been more interested in playing it than watching. I love playing it so much as there is nothing like executing a slick one-two or a piece of skill to amaze people, there is nothing like thinking 5 steps ahead of everyone else, knowing what will happen in a move, what you want to happen in a move and yet still being flexible enough to change at a moment’s notice when things do not exactly work out as planned.

Football is a game which it simply about getting the measure of your opponent and trying to score more goals than the opponent and that’s what things should be left to. So when threats are made, when people start essentially behaving like thugs and hooligans it spoils the fun for everyone else and if you are the sort of person that gets a thrill out of breaking someone’s ankle or leg in a game of football then…I pity you.

I feel sad and annoyed at how football has this sort of “laddish” culture towards it and people don’t display the proper amount of respect that anyone as a human being deserves. It’s sad how people can gain enjoyment over wanting to physically hurt another human being and using sport as your excuse where if you did that in the street that essentially is assault. Don’t get it misconstrued as I am not saying that no-one should tackle anyone as there is nothing wrong with a good tackle and I in fact really do appreciate a good challenge but when you are rushing in a 50/50 challenge at 100 miles an hour for a ball you have no chance of winning, what is the obsession with trying to just swing your foot and hit whatever you can? I’ve never understood that and while I don’t criticize referees as they do a tough enough job as it is. This is one thing I felt he should have been a bit tougher on as nobody should have to jump out the way of a reckless challen…assault, concede possession of the ball and then receive absolutely nothing for it. It worries me how little protection we get from teams who basically have thugs who want to kick and punch their way through ninety minutes of football.

The things such as threatening to break someone’s ankle after a game or even worse threatening to knock out a referee of all people simply because he didn’t like a decision, it’s sad how this is what passes as grassroots football, it’s sad how a team as violent and as scum as they were can proceed to the next round of a tournament, no doubt they will be reported and yet nothing will happen.

Vincent Kompany recently came out with a statement saying that at grassroots football racism is most prevalent during it which while that is indeed true I feel this whole racism issue as of late has been nothing but a buzzword for journalists and papers to sell their stories and to simply make money while not actually caring a bit for the actual issue on hand. The thing is at grassroots football the whole attitude stinks from racism to wanting to win matches to sportsmanship to respect. I really like playing football and it saddens me how more people at this level don’t really feel that way.

This is why England will not win anything, too much emphasis is given on physical and brute strength while not enough is on skill and technique of players and when you mix that in with the leniency that is shown to thugs and villains of the game all it does is create an environment where people with skill and talent get viciously kicked and harassed out of the game and then it just doesn’t become fun to play anymore and then become disillusioned and then they quit. Sure you can say that they do not have the character to rise against adversity and if their belief is strong they should keep pushing to achieve their goals and dreams but to that I say BULLSHIT! Complete and utter BULLSHIT!

Why should they have to constantly fight against the system? A system that should be set up to encourage talent, a system that should be set up to weed out stubborn players and to promote a positive way of thinking, a system that brings in players that want to win and enjoy football not to be violent and hurt people and get your enjoyment from that because then you are simply just in the wrong sport. In media everywhere such as films and TV shows we are constantly shown that good people get rewarded while the villains get punished, no doubt a lot of the times you will see the heroes of the story win at the end. Never has that been so false in football.

While I am only one man who doesn’t really have that much power to change anything, it really is time for a change.

The Green-Eyed Monster

When you watch things from the outside you start to become envious of what people have. Even more so with people who are close to you and especially more so with people who used to be close with you.

After watching Fullmetal Alchemist I got to thinking about which of the seven deadly sins was I the most guilty of and at first I thought it was Greed with a bit of Envy mixed in but now I truly believe it is solely just Envy. Of all the other sins I can't really see me being that but Envy...maybe it's because...I want to be someone else...nah that's simplifying it too much as I'm happy with what I am but...there are certain traits I desire from people...I see them do what comes naturally to them and I wish I could do the same but I...just can't. Or at least it would just be a pale imitation and all.

It's not just traits I desire but what they have as well. Maybe I am being greedy but I want a "best" friend. I see extremely good friends go about and I make friends and I...don't know...............would I consider any of them my best friend? Would...any of my friends consider me their best friend? Maybe it's my personality and the way I'm just viewing things that makes it seem like that, after all I don't actually (or I don't think I do) get close to anyone really and while I'm friends with a lot of people I often think maybe the bond with some isn't as strong as I'd like it to be.

Hahahaha, I shouldn't even be getting jealous by these types of things but I get jealous over my friends a lot. It might not seem it but it happens especially when I see another person talking to my friends and attaching a stronger bond. It's fucking ridiculous. Fucking Envy.

I envy how certain people can be all confident and go out the and do their business whereas I don't know, I'm not even sure about a single strength I have. Like I said I envy certain traits that my friends have.

And then we have couples...I hate couples...at least that's what I told myself...I hate the fact that they depend on each other so much that they inevitably end up hurting each other and the fact that due to emotions they can make such illogical decisions but I suppose the truth isn't that at all...the truth is a bit obvious now. The truth is that rather than pour my feelings on this sorry excuse for a blog, I'd rather be pouring it on someone who actually cares.

Yeah...talking to a "soul mate" who cares legitimately about your problems and loves you for you and would do anything for you while in turn I'd be willing to do the same back...but I guess that's the danger isn't it, building the perfect partner in your head that anyone that doesn't match up to the standards you've set for the perfect partner is automatically considered a "failure".

To finish this entry off I think of one more thing and one puzzle that mystifies me, something that I've been thinking about the last few days and that's my exes, how they seem...happy now...and yet that bothers me when it really shouldn't. I'll...have to think about that some more.

I predict a riot

How do I feel? Happy? Sad, Frightened? Worried? Blissful? I don't actually know, I suppose a combination of blissful and relaxed.

I was worried a bit for my position at Nike but they've sort of reassured me about the situation but I know I won't be relaxed until I start on the first day so until then I'm still slightly anxious for this to not blow up in my face.

Next up is these riots and it's served to do nothing to reaffirm my disappointment in this society. Okay I may not know about the cause of all this other than someone got shot during a protest blah blah blah but what I do know that all this rioting is unnecessary and pointless as well...nothing good is going to come out of it. I may have been all for starting a riot when I was younger (ahhh memories) but rioting without a purpose is....well, like I said, pointless. A change in government policy, a change in the way the place is run, an extremely controversial decision made in court or something like that okay, I can see a riot if enough people felt the same way but even so you'd have to decide whether the repercussions will be worth it for whatever change you had in mind but with this...there doesn't seem to be a purpose with this and that people are rioting and looting for the sake of it.

Anyway...what else is there? Ooh yes, the gym. Well that's going okay I guess, the programme that was given to me I'm trying to stick to and trying to stick to the amount of reps and sets but of course I have off days and that but I'm trying so that's something I'm pleased at. I've been doubted for long enough in regards to football so this year I'm going to be like "I'M BACK MOTHERFUCKERS!" and teach them a lesson in true greatness and what it looks like (me).

I am Jason Mycroft, accept no substitutes.

Life of a human

The human body, an amazing piece of work that we take for granted, whether we abuse it, look at it or whatever, we cannot deny that the body does so much for us and whenever I think about things I think we are helpless little creatures at the mercy of a lot of things. Natural elements, wear and tear, disease and just about everything and their dog are trying to kill off humans and yet the human race persists, amazing isn’t it? We manage to destroy ourselves in addition to everything else that’s trying to do the same.

While I could talk about a famous Mr Smith’s speech about how humans are like a virus but the truth is while yes we may have accelerated the destruction of this planet by however many years it is, I feel human can be and are an amazing specie.

No, what I was thinking was my knee when I went to shut a window and had to kneel on something, I couldn’t help but to think what happens when your body stops repairing itself? What happens when your lungs, your kidney or even your brain says “Nope, that’s it, I’m done, I’m out” and I think wow, maybe yes we are helpless little creatures.

Not only that but every time I think about space and this Earth and how vast out “there” is, you can’t help but think that you are sort of insignificant…but don’t take this to be depressing and miserable because mixed in with that feeling of insignificance is a equal and maybe more feeling of awe and amazement that there is just so much out there.

The possibilities as they say are truly endless.